Considering a Marriage Retreat in Indiana? Here’s 6 Questions to Ask
So, you and your spouse have decided to attend a couple’s therapy retreat? Good for you. There’s something truly noble about looking at your relationship and deciding that it needs a tune up or a major overhaul. Too many couples sit back and let their marriages fall apart without truly putting in the effort necessary to save a broken marriage.
If you’re even considering attending a couple’s therapy retreat, you’re in the minority of people who feel that their marriage is actually worth saving. Your dedication to preserving the sanctity of your marriage should be applauded. All too often, people give up on what could be an amazing marriage too early. Before you decide to attend a couple’s retreat, there are a few questions that you should ask first.
1. What is The Cost?
Don’t be one of those couples who say money is of no concern. While that is a noble sentiment, the last thing you want to do is overextend yourselves in the quest to fix your marriage. Money is often one of the factors that leads to an unhappy marriage and one of the things that many couples fight about.
What you need to decide is if a retreat is in your budget. If you think it is, then you should research the type of retreat that best fits your budgetary and emotional needs. You should only spend what you can actually afford. There are different options available, like a marriage workshop, which can be cheaper than a private one-on-one retreat. However, a retreat might not give you the needed alone time that you desire.
2. Is it a private or a group format?
There are a couple different formats to the couple’s therapy retreat that you should consider. The two different types of retreats are private and group retreats. There are benefits, and costs associated, to both.
The private retreat is where you and your spouse have the location to yourselves for the duration of your therapy retreat. A retreat like this gives you the opportunity to work in an intensive setting with plenty of quality alone time to help you work on the new strategies you learned and reconnect with your spouse. This is the more expensive of the two options.
The group retreat is where you and your spouse are part of a larger group where other couples will be present while you discuss your marital issues. There are some benefits to a group retreat. You can see some of the issues that other people are dealing with, which might make you feel less alone in your quest to repair your broken marriage. Sometimes, as the saying goes, there is strength in numbers
3. Is it a Religious or Non-religious retreat?
Many of the retreats available are religious, Christian based, retreats where the focus is not only on reconnecting with your spouse, but also with your faith. These retreats give your marriage and your Christian beliefs equal priority. A religious retreat will try to get you to focus your energy on how your relationship with god can be used as the catalyst to repair the issues you are having in your marriage.
A non-religious retreat will just focus on the issues that are plaguing your marriage without any faith based processes. The goal will be to just address the problems your marriage is facing and to work on strategies that will help fix these issues.
Both have a similar goal in mind, the healing of your marriage, but with different approaches. Ultimately, it is up to you to decide which of these options best fit your needs.
4. Is lodging part of the package or separate?
The costs associated with a marriage retreat can quickly add up. Many of the retreats include your room and board as part of the marital counseling, while others do not. You might be looking at a retreat that seems like a great deal until you realize that you are only paying for the therapy and your lodging (room, meals, etc,) is not included in the price.
This is where it is important to do your research on the retreat you are interested in attending and make sure it fits your budgetary limits. The last thing you want is to lock yourself into something you ultimately can’t afford.
5. Training and Expertise?
Not all couple’s retreats are created equal. Much of this comes down to the qualifications of the people who will be helping you fix your marriage. You want to make sure that the therapist is a licensed marriage and family therapist. Sometimes, you can get a therapist who was trained as a social worker and just does marital counseling on the side.
When you start to inquire into a retreat, you should ask the therapist what percentage of their practice is devoted to seeing couples each week. You want to seek out a retreat where the staff is specifically trained in couple’s therapy. The primary portion of their practice should be focused, almost exclusively, in this area. The people “in the trenches” every day will be the ones best suited to help you make the most out of your retreat experience.
6. Is Therapist Passionate About Marriage?
This last one might seem like a bit of a no-brainer, but it is probably one of the most important things to look for when choosing a couple’s retreat. What you want is a therapist who is very passionate about helping couples fix the issues in their marriage so they can have a renewed and thriving relationship.
Some counselors are neutral when it comes to marriage and divorce. They are more interested in keeping the peace than really helping you dig into the big issues of your marriage. Simply put, counselors like this either don’t really believe in marriage or aren’t willing to put in the hard work that saving a marriage entails. It may be fashionable to remain neutral in this type of setting, but you don’t want someone interested in keeping the status quo, you want a fighter who is committed to making sure you are able to resolve the most problematic areas of your struggling marriage.
Regardless of the type of retreat you ultimately decide on attending, you need to do your due diligence and research your options. These six questions are a good way to help you find the retreat that will meet all your needs. That way, when you eventually attend the retreat, you can focus on your marriage, which should be the goal of your time at a couple’s retreat.